You really have done a number on me. This week has been a total sh*t show, but you weren’t finished with me yet. Imagine coming to terms with things and accepting it for what it is to then have a new spanner thrown into the works. Maybe the least expected one of them all.
You find out they’re with someone new after a month. It doesn’t matter that it was them that chose to end it. It doesn’t take away the pain. Sorry doesn’t fix it. Sorry doesn’t reverse the hands of time so that was never discovered. But heartbreak, you were ready for me to know. Just when I thought things couldn’t get worse and here we are.
When you give everything to someone and they throw that back in your face, it’s really unpleasant. You’re picking yourself back up and dusting yourself off just to be kicked back to the curb again.
I guess what I actually came here to say is, I won’t let you win. Heartbreak, you’ve already taken enough out of me. I can’t let you have anymore. I can’t mentally or physically take anymore of the pain.
The self-torture is the worst part of it all. You feel stupid for ever thinking they loved you. Well, the truth is the only thing that can heal you. It’s offers the freedom to decide how you deal with the cards you’ve been dealt.
I choose me. I choose to move on. I choose to let my heart rest and my mind heal.
There are still so many people who do love and care about me and that’s what matters. They are what helps me get through this. None of what my friends and family have done for me has gone unnoticed. I’m truly grateful to every single person who’s been on this journey with me. It’s not been easy. I love you all.